I think, therefore i blog

I have a bad habit of blogging too late at night. And on weekends. I guess my brain and heart are full and I feel the need
to share, particularly now. so I can sleep.

Today I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships that used to be. People I once was close to and shared my hopes and dreams with…friends I thought would be around for life, or at least most if it.

Then time passes, and you or they enter a new stage of life or you remain behind while they soldier on to the next adventure. The phone calls get further apart. Your interaction and social lives diverge. Life goes on. You drift away.

On the other hand, there is one or sometimes a few, if you’re a lucky one like me, that are like the sisters your parents never gave birth to. Through the ebb and flow of life, they are constant. you figure out how you relate under new life experiences and stick like Gorilla Glue, no matter how many miles separate.

I’m in a place right now that feels like friend limbo. The sister-friends aside, I feel a little adrift.

One of my besties will be leaving MN sometime this year. I’m married, a couple friends aren’t. I have a kiddo now, and some friends don’t or some have more than one. I’m still getting to know the women in our new (and wonderful!) church and small group. I live a lot further north than 75% of the women I know at MOMS and through other social connections.

I’m not whining. I just need some relational ballast.

I can’t really figure out what I’m so nostalgic about regarding the friends that have slid out of my embrace, but I miss them.

I struggle inwardly to make new connections, even though I appear extroverted. My deep self both yearns and loathes vulnerability in a dissonant chord.

My only remedy for this weird sort of friendship purgatory is to invite people over, to put myself out there and hope that the other person might crave female companionship as much as I do.

Friendships take time, but darn it all, time seems to take friendships. Ah, there it is again, the bittersweetness of life.

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making the leap

well, the time has finally come.

I’ve had a xanga blog for lo these five years past. 🙂 Such a good little bloggy it has been to me. I feel like I’m cheating on it by moving to this new site, but the truth is, more of the world reads blogspot and wordpress blogs and the interface is easier. So here I am.

A wonderful friend is going to help me make it more personal and add some fun touches here and there over time, but for now, this is it. I blog mostly for myself and the many friends and family members that live far away and want to keep up on our lives.

I’ve got some new ideas for this new blog in this new year of 2011 – I’m going to do a 52 week self-portrait challenge. Kinda narcissistic, but I think it will be fun. I’m also going to share some of my favorite recipes, post menus that I’ve put together, and do some fun giveaways. Nothing like $250 Anthropologie gift cards, but things I love and think others might too.

I hope you’ll follow me here if you read my xanga, and maybe I’ll make some new “online” friends too! Is it appropriate to get housewarming gifts for a new blog?

Just kidding! 🙂